A concert tonight featuring the “alien who fell to earth” act of Madjack, real name Brian McVittie, got out of control this evening, leading to over a dozen public indecency arrests. Venue manager Robert Cooley commented “This the kind of carnal revelry the Saturnalia hasn’t seen here for almost a decade. And while it’s refreshing that people can still find the trust to let love in, some people felt the public fornication might have been a step too far.”

“It’s just love,” McVittie said, “How can that be a bad thing? Two blocks from the Saturnalia, a place called The Apple Theater was showing far worse on screen than what I witnessed from the stage tonight. Worse, there is no way the movie being screened, Naked Abandon, could purport to be representative of a loving relationship. If you knew the profound sadness and anger that permeated the air there, you would arrest the producer of that film. I swear. Some times I don’t know whether to laugh and cry at your quaint human customs.”

Either by coincidence or blind luck, nine of the twelve people arrested at tonight’s show were already wanted on outstanding warrants while one turned out to be international jewel thief Arctic Fox. “I heard the new album,” Arctic Fox said from the back of the squad car. “Something about it really spoke to me, so when I had the chance to catch Madjack live, I couldn’t pass it up. Despite how things turned out, I have no regrets.”

Madjack finished out his set and did two encores after the brief interruption, and his management has volunteered to pay for any damages. The tour continues on to a sold out show in New York tomorrow and Baltimore two days after that. “We’re bringing love all the way across the country,” McVittie said with a wink. We have no reason to suspect anything else.